How To Find A Wife

Hmmmmmm….. *Deep breath* I can see
many ‘men’raising their eyebrows in
cynicism as they read the
title, ‘ hopefully’ there will
becsomething helpful here for you. I
was asked to make a post on this topic,
fear made me want to postpone it but I
decided the sooner I keep my promise,
the better. So, this is it guys! All those
years of ‘brotherly’ advice, counselling
and inspiration – plus observation will
finally be put on paper. Please ‘bros’ if
you’re reading this article because
you’re looking for a cheap score, and
you’re not ready to grow up and
commit, this article is not for you…
(read it and pass it on to your serious
friends!)
****
He that FINDETH a wife, not he that
‘wishes’, ‘prays’, or dreams (or asks his
mother) is the one that obtains favour.
Finding a wife takes, time, patience,
focus and determined efforts. No matter
what you think, ALL women want to be
pursued; they want to be sought after
(that’s why she took 6 months to say
“yes”). You can’t just walk up to a
stranger that you don’t know (or the
first lady who smiles at you in a bus or
a plane) and ask for her hand in
marriage or a date. Only a fool or a
desperate woman will agree to go out
with you or spend her life with you
when she doesn’t know you. Here are a
couple of things you need to find “MRS
RIGHT”:
1. FIND her heart:
Invest time in the woman you’re
interested in. Discover her passion,what
makes her angry or sad and what
makes her tick. This is easier to do
when you don’t judge or criticise every
little fault. There are no perfect women;
over-criticism and impossibly high
standards will push her away or turn
her to a hypocrite and you won’t know
the real person. Know what she loves,
her values, her dreams, and her
purpose. If you really want to spend the
rest of your life with someone, you need
to
know if you’re going in the same
direction. (It’s stupid to propose to a
woman who wants to travel the world
in a jet and you want to be a
missionary in a remote village). Yes,
she will change some things for you, but
it’s always easier if you know the kind
of life she really wants to live and if
you can provide it.If you want her to
say yes, your goal is to find your way
into her heart (not her bed) and plant
yourself there. Stop talking about why
she should be with you and show her
why (without closing your bank
account). Listen to her more, read
between the lines of what she says.
When hubby and I were dating, he
came to visit me and I was talking
about a conference in my church at the
time and how ‘we’ as ushers were going
to print t-shirts with the word “USHER”
written at the back. I began to joke
about how I’d love to get a t-shirt with
my
name on the collar and ‘Nigeria’ at the
back. I forgot about our little
conversation, but months later my
birthday came and I got two t-shirts;
both had my name at the back and one
had ‘TOMI NIGERIA’ on the collar. He
was actually listening! That was my best
birthday present ever. I wore that shirt
for years till the writing was completely
faded and the t-shirt had holes I
couldn’t patch together. Listen to her
heart, and when you speak, she won’t
be able to say no!
2. Find Yourself:
There are many lover boys who have no
problem finding the heart of the
woman they love, but they haven’t yet
discovered themselves. You won’t find
a real woman simply because you have
a few romantic lyrics- and a sketchy
idea of who you are. Real women are
drawn to purpose and a strong sense of
identity, which is why wealthy men,
powerful men and rebels a.k.a bad
boys seem to be getting more
attention.You don’t need to change who
you are or pretend; you are an awesome
‘bro’ with a unique personality and a
great purpose. Give the woman you
love the chance to know your heart. Be
confident enough to let the real you
shine through. Deal with your personal
issues first, find your purpose and
passion, get your life in order (find a
job or start your business) and the
woman will pay attention.